Begawan Swandagni is silent again for a moment. His memories go back in time, to who he really is. He is the son of king Yasarata in Ngayodyapala, a kingdom that is majestic, rich and glorious. He is the youngest son, his three older brothers are Dasarata, Rawatmaja and Wisrawa. Rawatmaja and Wisrawa decided to leave the glory of the palace and go into meditation to become priests. Begawan Swandagni has followed in the footsteps of his two brothers, until finally becoming a priest at the Jatisrana hermitage. After King Yasarata died, it was Dasarata who inherited the throne and became the king of the Ngayodyapala kingdom.
“So you're not just a priest's son in an isolated hermitage, far from the splendor of the palace. You are the grandson of a king, Sumantri."
These are the stories and words that Begawan Swandagni repeatedly tells Sumantri before Sukrosono's return to Jatisrana hermitage.
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> The Bajang Child Swinging the Moon (54)
> The Bajang Child Swinging the Moon (53)
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> The Bajang Child Swinging the Moon (51)
Meanwhile, Begawan Swandagni does not educate Sumantri only as a priest's son but also as a grandson of the king. So in addition to learning asceticism and mysticism, Sumantri is trained in the knowledge of chivalry. He must be diligent in undergoing meditation, but at the same time he must galvanize himself with invincibility and supernatural power. All of his father's knowledge and everything he has mastered have been passed on to him. Begawan Swandagni observes that Sumantri prefers to practice chivalry than to sink into priestly meditation. He also shows himself to be more highly developed in the virtues of chivalry than of self-reflection, the fruit of meditation.
Begawan Swandagni himself is happy and proud of his son's development and thinks in his heart, "No wonder he is a descendant of King Ngayodyapala."
Therefore, he is happy whenever he sees Sumantri say goodbye to go into meditation, to be secluded in the quiet mountains, to deepen his supernatural powers. Every time he comes home after undergoing meditation, Begawan Swandagni is amazed at how much knowledge of chivalry his son has absorbed. He has no doubt about the supernatural power of his son. He is sure that his son will be able to face any opponent or challenge.
At such moments, Begawan Swandagni does not forget to remind him, “Sumantri, you are indeed a great knight. But remember, you are my son. Be careful. Do not exalt the noble ancestry of the king or your supernatural power as a knight. Maintain your awareness that you are a priest's son who lives in seclusion in Jatisrana. Keep yourself away from the charms and temptations of the great pride and luxury of the king's palace, which can push you into the abyss of humiliation and misery."
Sumantri wants to accompany his father because by doing so he can also ease his father's sadness.
It is not easy for Sumantri to internalize his father's advice. He is frequently involved in turmoil in his mind about the awareness that he is more of a knight than a priest's son. "In reality, in me there flows the blood of warriors," he commonly says proudly in his heart. Not infrequently, he is determined to immediately leave to carry out his chivalric dharma. But he holds back that desire because he does not have the heart to leave his father alone in Jatisrana. Furthermore, he wants to stay with his father, who is sad and feels guilty for having abandoned his younger brother, Sukrosono, and making his wife, Dewi Sokawati sad, until finally leaving him forever. Sumantri wants to accompany his father because by doing so he can also ease his father's sadness.
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> The Bajang Child Swinging the Moon (50)
> The Bajang Child Swinging the Moon (49)
> The Bajang Child Swinging the Moon (48)
Begawan Swandagni is well aware of his son's struggles. And he is grateful that Sumantri tries his best to hold back his desire because he wants to accompany the loneliness and sadness of his heart. After Sukrosono arrives home, he is relieved and feels that Sumantri will never leave Jatisrana. Sumantri loves his younger brother very much. It cannot be imagined how he will have the heart to leave him.
Sometimes Begawan Swandagni realizes that his words are just to amuse himself. He is sure there will come a time when all self-consolation and desire will disappear. And now he is startled. Apparently this is the time when Sumantri will disclose what has been buried deep in his heart. So he breaks all his daydreams and tries to accept the reality that is now in front of him.
“Sumantri, do you really want to go to Maespati?”
Finally, these words emerge from Begawan Swandagni's lips.
"Yes, father, I have made up my mind to go," replies Sumantri.
"Why don't you wait until your younger brother comes back?"
"No, father. He will certainly want me to stay here. He'll definitely want to come with me."
"What's wrong with inviting your younger brother, Sumantri?"
"It seems you pretend not to know what's in my heart, father."
He wants to tell the sadness as it is. But he is afraid it will hurt Sumantri's heart.
Begawan Swandagni does know Sumantri's heart. He understands; how can a handsome knight have a younger brother with a demon face? This will certainly be an obstacle that will hinder his service as a knight. What king would believe it? Begawan Swandagni really understands all that. But behind it all, he knows the most basic reason why Sumantri does not want to invite his younger brother. Yes, Sumantri is ashamed of his ugly younger brother, even though he loves him very much. This is what breaks Begawan Swandagni’s heart. He wants to tell the sadness as it is. But he is afraid it will hurt Sumantri's heart.
(This article was translated by Hyginus Hardoyo).
