Being so close to death that it has become a shadow, the story about Dewi Citrawati and Sumantri actually no longer exists. Their story has simply dissolved in the remnants of events that are no longer theirs.
By
Sindhunata
·6 minutes read
In Maespati, no one knows that Sukrosono is dead. Indeed, no one needs to know, because Sukrosono is nothing to them. They don't even know his name, let alone that he is the younger brother of their mahapatih (chief warlord) Sumantri, who bears the title Patih Suwondo. Sukrosono died unknown, even though he was actually the one who got Dewi Citrawati and brought Sriwedari Garden to Maespati.
Sukrosono's death united Sumantri and Dewi Citrawati. But his death also separated them. With Sukrosono's death, the door of love that had been closed for so long suddenly opened. In the bushes of Sriwedari, Sumantri and Dewi Citrawati entered this door, and enjoyed what they had kept hidden for so long. They entered the act of love that had previously seemed forbidden to them. But at the peak of their lovemaking, Sukrosono's death came upon them and separated them.
Under the light of the full moon at the end of their pleasure, they suddenly realized that they had made love amidst the death of a person who had loved them and saved them. They didn’t even know how it was possible that such a tragic death had united them in the pleasurable act of lovemaking. There was no answer. All they know now is that Sukrosono's death has separated them. And they could not prevent this, because Sukrosono's death has also brought death to approach them slowly to become a part of their lives. The death that is approaching makes them realize that life is not as long as they thought. More than that, they now know that death is in their lives. Otherwise, how could their enjoyment of lovemaking only end in separation? They grow to realize that there is actually no wall between death and separation.
Indeed, Sukrosono's death has driven Sumantri and Dewi Citrawati apart. Not because they were forced, it happened on its own. Now, Sumantri truly feels saddened because of Sukrosono's death. Everything he has achieved, from the title and rank of mahapatih to Dewi Citrawati, cannot replace the loss of his younger brother. His younger brother who died in his arms has even awakened him to the realization that all his dreams have been shattered in pain. The pain has opened the eyes of his heart: Dewi Citrawati’s love that he has taken is actually not the love he wants. If so, why did he fall into that love? Only the death of his beloved younger brother showed him the answer. Thus, his love for Dewi Citrawati has been dissolved in the death of his younger brother.
CAHYO HERYUNANTO
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Meanwhile, Dewi Citrawati is also filled with sorrow. She can feel the sorrow of Sumantri who lost his younger brother, because his sorrow is also hers. Just before he died, Sukrosono gave her one last smile. That smile reminded her of who she really was and why she was always denying herself. Sukrosono's death brought back her lost self. But once she accepted it, she also had to put aside all that she had dreamed of.
She knows she has no right to have Sumantri, because Sumantri does not belong in her life. She should be happy with her life now, because she is willing to accept it again. But that happiness does not eliminate the sadness. She is sad because she realizes that there would have been no need for Sukrosono to die if she had accepted herself from the beginning. If she had not dreamed about Sumantri, there would have been no need for Sumantri to be ashamed of his younger brother. Didn't Sukrosono, who had once saved her life, die in the end because of her, too?
Sukrosono's death has bound Dewi Citrawati and Sumantri in the same sorrow. The sorrow binds them more than their love. Therefore, they simply accept where the sorrow takes them, even when the sorrow finally separates them. Indeed, the sorrow has suddenly become a wall that prevents them from seeing each other. The wall of sorrow has sent them into their own isolation. And being in isolation not only gives them a sense of loneliness, but also expression to their guilt. The guilt hounds them: Why did they deny themselves until they were caught in the trap of wishful thinking that only led them to grief? Their guilt also makes them feel that what they had achieved was futility.
Dewi Citrawati required a variety of impossible things, only so she could avoid becoming the queen of Maespati. Because of Sumantri's sacrifice, these requirements became a reality, which only led her to more futility. Meanwhile, Sumantri had achieved his highest ideals of chivalry when he was appointed the mahapatih of Maespati. But he now feels that this high degree of chivalry was not his true goal. And when he imagines his happiness in Jatisrana, he realizes that happiness is gone. He feels that such happiness would still exist if Sukrosono was also there. Now Sukrosono is gone forever and with him, the happiness Sumantri had is gone, too.
Gripped in a sorrow laden with guilt, now Dewi Citrawati is happy to see the asana flowers falling and with this, she imagines herself to be the pollen of the pandan flowers whose fragrance has faded. Meanwhile, Sumantri is no longer curious about when the stars will come out, when the moon will shine brightly. He only knows that every day, the sun disappears below the horizon and along with it, death seems to grow closer. Sumantri feels that his life is one of eternal waiting, and that what he most waits for is death. Without realizing it, it is in such a state that he likes to imagine that Sukrosono will come get him and take him to freedom.
Being so close to death that it has become a shadow, the story about Dewi Citrawati and Sumantri actually no longer exists. Their story has simply dissolved in the remnants of events that are no longer theirs.
